The dose most dreaded

Some people possess the power to make you feel terrible every single time they talk to you. You dread them.

They will always seem to point out at what you did not do right, or how minuscule your efforts really are, or how dissatisfactory your progress has been. Interacting with them leaves you feeling distraught, and angry with him/ her and more so with yourself. The person says all sorts of things that rain like swords on your ears and heart.

Wait, it gets worse.

If the person giving you the dose is someone you love, then it is very likely that what they say always seems to be right. You really start believing that you’re slow, and half-hearted and minuscule. Then the self-bashing and self-pity follows. How come they seem to know exactly what I should best do, and how come it never occurs to me? How is it that I’m still making no big difference? How come I’m still so far behind?

Then follows the very irrational outburst of optimism and determination. Of ‘enough is enough’ and ‘I’m going to prove myself’ and all that lava. But most of the times, these ourbursts evaporate just as easily as they explode, until its time to face the dreaded music again.

Nothing is wrong with these outbursts. And there is no point trying to stop the intimidating person’s terrifying speech.

It is what we decide to take from the speech that matters. What we do with the anger and anguish that burns inside is what changes everything. But we know best what we ought to change in ourselves, we can choose whose words should matter, and in what magnitude. We’re the ones living our life. We’re the ones who should be living it.

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